The Elephant In The Room: Abuse During Isolation and The Miracle

Updated: May 11, 2020

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There is an increase in stress during times of change. There is fear when there is uncertainty. And any time there is stress and fear together, there will always be conflict. Conflict doesn't always make us feel comfortable. When we do not feel comfortable we tend to respond in ways that only we know we can- ways we were taught.

Not everyone has been taught how to deal with feelings of discomfort. Change is uncomfortable. It is scary. Change in control is scariest of all. When we are "squeezed," we experience what we are made of. We are being squeezed now. We are scared, worried, nervous, concerned, angry, frustrated, hoping... Isn't anyone listening? It is all so surreal. However, know now that you are not alone.

Some of us are moms, wives, dads, husbands, teachers, doctors, delivery drivers, nurses, daughters, animal rescuers, neighbors, brothers, Pastors, leaders, business owners, family members... All of us experience feelings and emotions that are very real and very understandable, especially in times like this. It is easy to take these feelings out on those we love, even when we take out our feelings on ourselves. We scream and lose control. We internalize and become passive-aggressive with our behavior. We project. We ignore. We shut down. We shut out. Everything. Including the help and miracles with secretly wish we had.

As this current situation unfolds on a global level, it is important to remember that it takes a village when stress is near. Why? Because if we knew how to handle stress in a positive way, we wouldn't want relief. Allowing in help brings relief. Your village can consist of friends, neighbors, professionals, spiritual leaders, family, a book, a movie.. But that village is also made up of Spirit, Loved Ones from the other side, Angels, Guides, Ascended Masters, the Collective Consciousness- Beings of the highest truth and light. Sometimes the miracle we need comes in the form of our village.

Lean on this village now.

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1) Stress is real. So is peace. We were often taught to meet stress with stress. This situation is only giving us the opportunity to try different so that we can let our peace in.

2) What does different look like? How did your parents and those who have formed your upbringing handle stress? How did they show you how to handle frustration? Fear? Anger? Did their choices make you feel safe? Did they make you feel scared? Anxious? Alone? Different looks like any behavior that is new that inspires peace, calm, love- the very things your intuitive heart knew you needed to learn, but wasn't truly shown.

Whether we were taught how to face life head-on with courage, or look the other way in denial, 'different' becomes the very thing that we can practice with now. Not only so that we can live in a way that is joyful and full of life, but because different is the very thing that those who look up to us are wishing to learn from us, too. Sometimes we go through hell and come back because WE are the difference for those we love, including our own inner Self. During times of stress, how do we respond? Choosing different means looking at new ways of responding that feel good, feel safe, feel hopeful. Give yourself permission to choose different ways of responding to stress because it is ok and safe to feel good, feel at ease, feel valid, feel special, feel seen, feel heard. When we continue to repeat old patterns of negative responses to change/ stress, we block ourselves from the very feelings we are wanting to feel.

3) Choose your juice! Stress threatens to cripple our truth, but it also comes with hidden opportunities that ALLOW us to practice the 'different.' How else can we learn 'different' if we aren't in a situation that helps us practice it? Stress allows us to see exactly what we have inside. Wayne Dyer talks about the metaphor of the orange and why the inside matters.

"When someone puts the pressure on you and out of you comes anything other than love, it’s because that’s what you’ve allowed to be inside. Once you take away all those negative things you don’t want in your life and replace them with love, you’ll find yourself living a highly functioning life." - Wayne Dyer

What kind of juice will come out of an orange? No matter why or how the orange is squeezed, it will always create orange juice. Because that's what's inside. Stress creates "squeezing." What juice comes out of you? Out of us comes hatred, bitterness, tension, stress. What comes out is

what's inside. Are we the victim of our squeezing, or are we the creators of the kind of juice we want to drink? Choose your juice. Heck, change the fruit! That is the difference. We can't give away what we don't have. Stress allows us to learn new ways that help us choose our juice.

Creativity is life in motion. Therefore, when we allow stress to inspire our own creativity- creative ways of handling stress, of communicating, or playing, or thinking, or simply just being, we stop stress from crippling us. We then allow stress to be the catalyst that brings us new ways to live our life in motion. Creativity "unstucks" us. Creativity requires inspiration. During times like this, stay inspired. In spirit. Inspirado. Lean on your village. We are simply being "juiced."

4) Ease into the fear. When we face stress/ fear with stress/ fear, we will always feel resentment, disconnect, insignificant, not enough, off, wrong. And it doesn't feel good! So much so, that we subconsciously lash out at others who see the good in us. Don't allow this period of time to harden you. You are a Being of love! Softness. Truth. Ease. The very ease you desire is because it is within you first. Because we were raised with the feelings of uneasiness, we are only "used to" those feelings. We only simply know dysfunction. We know pain. And the more we "see it," the more we know it. We are constantly creating the very awareness of the very things we don't want to feel and see. Align with who you are. Easy. Ease into. Softly. One breath at a time.

"Little by little. Bit by bit. Little bit by little bit," - Paul Simon.

Ease. Breathe. Breathe in Ease. Hold. Hold. Feel that. That IS you being easy! And exhale... let go. Let go of the old patterns that breed disease. Breathe in ease and softly allow the ease to change you.

5) Remember WHO you are. You are not wrong. You are not bad. You are not off. You are not worthless. You are not what was done to you. You are WHY you are here. What inspires you? What do you want? What do you want for those you love? What feels "better?" What makes you smile? What makes you feel productive? What does your body need? Say? What do you need most? What makes you sing? What calls to your heart? Who are you? Because in anger and in fear and in darkness, we are not. You are the hope. You are the change that is so very needed in this world. In fact, YOU are the reason. Because you ARE. This isn't mumbo jumbo bull script. It's true script. Truth- real breathing, unfolding, amazing, new, different... You are everything. Every. Good. Thing. And this WILL blow over and you WILL be okay. We will be okay. Allow me to be that new voice that reminds you just how able you really are. I am a part of your village. Always have been. Always will be. Through my "stress," I have learned (very wobbly at times) how to be different. And I am able to hold you up and remind you now. We got this. You are not alone. Don't isolate in pain. Breathe in isolation and the pain will begin to turn from fear to love. And that is THE miracle.

Recap: - Lean on your village (who are they?) - Take notice of how you currently respond to stress/ change. - Choose different. Let peace in. - Choose your juice. Allow stress to inspire new ways to respond to pressure. - Be creative. Stay inspired. Get inspired. - Be easy. This is new. It takes practice. It's okay. Learn to in-joy the ease in areas where disease is felt. - Take it easy. One moment at a time. One breath at a time. Be present. - Remember who you are, why you are here, and what it is you really want in life. Stress has a way of making us see the very areas in ourself and our life that need us the most. - Go back to your village, Make sure your village is a village that lifts you. You will need them during times of uncertainty. Surround yourself with those you in-joy, who inspire your well-being because they believe in you being well. This is a great time to explore your spiritual village, too! Stress has a way of bringing us face to face with our faith and the reality of just how creative in faith we can be.

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